New Guest Blogger- Lukas

I wanted to introduce a new guest blogger to the many readers of the blog. I have brought in Luke Winter to bring a new outlook into the Premiership and life. Luke and I played on the club soccer team at UVA together and was also my big brother during my brief stay in the fraternity which shall not be named. I am honored to present the first of his many contributions below:

Greetings fellow bloggers, soccer fanatics, cool people, and Rob Gordon. While contemplating the topic of this finest guest appearance, I decided why limit myself? This is the world of sports as I see it…in 3s.

3 things to stay to NBC executives about their coverage of the Olympics. 1. You have vastly overestimated my willingness to watch curling and women’s ice hockey. Curling is OK for 30 mins every 4 years. Women’s hockey is never OK. 2. No matter how many times you tell me that an ice skating couple are a couple outside of the rink, I will never believe it. 3. Women’s hockey is NEVER OK!

3 worst dressed Premier League players. 1. Roman Pavlyuchenco – who ever wears long sleeves with thumb-holes cut in them? Goths wearing fishnet shirts and Spurs rejects. 2. Pascal Chimbonda – am I the only one tired of seeing him prance around in ballet tights under his shorts? Is he really not man enough to expose the middle 6 inches of his legs to the 30 degree England winter? 3. Fabien Barthez – This spot is reserved for any player who pulls his socks up over his knees. Barthez just happened to be the first that came to mind (Henry too, though neither play in Prem. now).

(No, it was not a coincidence that two of the aforementioned players donned Spurs jerseys.)

3 worst off field decisions. 1. Tiger…nuff said. 2. John Terry – that underwear model may look good with the airbrush of the magazines, but she’s got some great “but-her-face” potential. 3. John Daly – even though he lost over 100 lbs and isn’t drinking as much and may actually have added 20 years back onto his life, I can’t help but notice that he is decidedly less funny. Nobody cares if a skinny white guy goes onto a golf course and hits the ball hard. It’s only entertaining if he’s fat, swearing, smoking a cig, and drinking a beer.

3 predictions for rest of season. 1. Liverpool will take 4th . I know Rob disagrees, but the squad is just too deep and Man City has no defense. When Torres and Gerrard are back playing well, they’ll shoot back up. Though I hate to admit it, status quo will stay. 2. Someone on Real Madrid will speak out publicly about how selfish Ronaldo is…big shocker. He’d rather take a left footed backheel on goal from 30 yds than pass to a teammate. 3. An Englishman will be the leading scorer for the first time since Shearer. This will only heighten the level of cockiness coming from the potbellied English fan with yellow teeth in time for England to make their traditional World Cup exit in the Quarterfinals because he’s too tired from playing every game for Man U…while the USA march on!!!

-Luke

Negrodamus

I shit you not, this was Bobby Zamora's girlfriend. The blog has needed a babe on it for a while. This is really overdue.


A certain reader of the blog has recently come out with some outlandish statements concerning the end of the season Premiership table. His comments have forced me to make some predictions of my own: Tottenham will take home sixth and lose in the FA Cup final to Manchester City. You may ask why I don't have us finishing any better or taking home the Cup. Let me explain...I would love to predict us finishing in the top 4 and bringing another trophy back to White Hart Lane more than anything. I would also like to make sweet, sweet love to Miley Cyrus, but I have to be prudent. She's seventeen until November so I must bide my time. This same theory applies to Tottenham. I must wait until Harry has had at least one more summer transfer market to make the necessary moves for this team to crack the top 4. We just aren't ready yet. The push this season has been exciting and brought me more joy than I can remember, but it just isn't going to happen. Liverpool and Manchester City will finish above us. Man City will be the ones to claim the final Champions League spot with Liverpool finally dropping out. This could be the beginning of the end for Liverpool. Without the Champs League money, Gillette/Hicks will be in an awful position financially and I find it hard to believe they won't be forced into selling a few of their best assets. After watching our two games against Aston Villa, we are easily the better squad. The results didn't show that, but it's true. They will take seventh with Everton and Fulham behind.

My cousin predicts Everton and Fulham to climb ahead of Tottenham. Let me counter that almost insane prophecy. Both clubs are in the Europa League. What does that mean? It means a lot of traveling to far away places and playing more matches with squads getting thinner and thinner. Everton just lost Fellaini and will soon lose Donovan. Both players have been instrumental in their recent success. Everton is better prepared to handle injuries than Fulham. Fulham is still alive in the FA Cup as well. You know you are in a bad spot when you are hoping Danny Murphy stays healthy. How in the hell are they doing so well with him pulling the strings in midfield? Is Fulham where former Spurs flops go to revive their career. Zamora, Murphy, Davies, Kelly???? Shit, even Konchesky suited up for us for a brief time. I digress...Both clubs are too far down the table and both have European matches hanging over their heads. They don't have the squads to make the huge push it would take.

So here it is, my top 10 at the end of the season. It looks almost identical to how the table looks now:

Chelski
Manure
ARSEnal
Money Bags Man City
GoodbyeTrophiesAndChampionsLeaguePool
Tottenham
Aston Villians
Donovanton
Tottenham's Second Squad
Just Plain Boring as Shit Birmingham

Why I am a Tottenham Supporter

My brother once asked me why in the world we were Hotspur supporters. It is so much easier to be a fan of a team that has had prolonged success or a team that has low expectations. If you support Manure, Chelski, ARSEnal, or Liverpool, you have become too accustomed to winning. You no longer appreciate the wins over the Birminghams and Boltons or battling Aston Villa or Everton away and getting a point. It is expected to do well anytime you play, home or away. Now, as a Spurs supporter, you take nothing for granted. The beauty is that we spend a ton of money, just as much as the Woolwich Wanderers (Arsenal), and yet can't seem to regain the glory of the past. It creates so much promise and hope at the beginning of each season to spend the money on big name players, and then so much despair when we can't rise to that promise. As a result, I end up appreciating every win and taking nothing cheaply. I want to watch every game because I don't expect any result against any team, but I long for success. The club will never be held down by low supporter expectations or giving up on the dream of Champions League qualification. What fun is constant success? Even after the terrible result against a weakened Liverpool today, I still have a craving to watch the FA Cup game this Saturday at noon against Leeds. We had a great opportunity to end Liverpool's season and couldn't take advantage. Such is the life of a Tottenham supporter. I will continue on...Come on you Spurs!

There is good news for the other team I support though. The United States has seemingly dodged a huge bullet in regards to Clint Dempsey's injury. It looks like he won't need surgery on that knee and could possibly return to play again this season for Fulham. Even Oguchi Onyewu gave positive news concerning his injury. I am still holding my breath, but for now, the outlook for our stars is positive. I'll take the positive news about the United States injury report for the loss to Liverpool. I'm an American before a Spur supporter. Country over club and never the other way around.